http://forums.webfictionguide.com/ Web Fiction Guide Forums » Tag: angst - Recent Posts en Fri, 10 Feb 2012 04:25:04 +0000 http://forums.webfictionguide.com/topic/how-to-freak-out-friends-and-influence-people/page/2#post-4900 Thu, 08 Apr 2010 12:28:46 +0000 Lyn Thorne-Alder 4900@http://forums.webfictionguide.com/ <p>On the original topic, I do have one reader, an IRL friend, who has told me he feels that the entire school of Addergoole &amp; everyone in it ought to be nuked. He feels very strongly about it, as he does about most things - and yet he keeps reading.</p> <p>I have given specific him-content-warnings: "You really don't want to read that bonus story," but otherwise don't alter the story. I sort of have to accept that people who have an issue with mind control, manipulation, and devious behaviors really aren't going to like my story, or parts of it, and go with the flow there. </p> http://forums.webfictionguide.com/topic/how-to-freak-out-friends-and-influence-people/page/2#post-4899 Thu, 08 Apr 2010 12:21:17 +0000 intergal 4899@http://forums.webfictionguide.com/ <p>I'm with Lyn, mcahograth and Wysteria.</p> <p>Admittedly, while a "sense of entitlement" can be found simmering amongst some people, it is definitely not the case in this particular example. It's one thing to pander to a person's selfish whim, but it is another thing entirely when a friend turns around to you and says "What you wrote genuinely upset me". And I agree, it's a difficult call.</p> <p>I don't think anyone here encouraged Wysteria to change the story on the basis of their friend's reaction or said that is what you ought to do; they've merely pointed out that this kind of criticism is something that probably all web authors eventually face, but that they're entitled to feel upset/worried because the reaction came from an unexpected quarter, especially one so personal. </p> http://forums.webfictionguide.com/topic/how-to-freak-out-friends-and-influence-people/page/2#post-4890 Thu, 08 Apr 2010 10:00:43 +0000 Lyn Thorne-Alder 4890@http://forums.webfictionguide.com/ <p>"Do we live our lives hoping not to offend people around us?"</p> <p>"Yes, actually."</p> <p>"You counsel people to surrender what is important to gain the passing affection and/or fancy of others. Noted. "</p> <p>Thank you, mcahogarth, Wystie. :-)</p> <p>I'm not counseling anyone; I'm stating a fact about myself. I don't like offending people. I don't often modify my _self_ in the quest of non-offensiveness, though I may modify my words or actions. </p> http://forums.webfictionguide.com/topic/how-to-freak-out-friends-and-influence-people#post-4888 Thu, 08 Apr 2010 09:50:22 +0000 Wysteria 4888@http://forums.webfictionguide.com/ <p>I tend to think that seeking harmony is a form of self-expression in and of itself. Rather like black is a color. </p> http://forums.webfictionguide.com/topic/how-to-freak-out-friends-and-influence-people#post-4886 Thu, 08 Apr 2010 08:59:36 +0000 M.C.A. Hogarth 4886@http://forums.webfictionguide.com/ <p>I think it's pretty harsh to call wanting not to offend people surrendering to their fancies. The truth is that life is a complicated give and take between the compromises we make living in a society with other people and what we believe and want and need. Nothing is as simple as "be true to your heart and damn the consequences" unless you're living on a desert island.</p> <p>I don't think anyone is saying you should subordinate your artistic integrity to make other people happy. But realizing that your art affects people and that you have to deal with the consequences... and that you might not want to deal with those consequences... that you might in fact prefer to modify what you're saying to avoid them... is just life. And is a valid choice if you value harmony over self-expression. </p> http://forums.webfictionguide.com/topic/how-to-freak-out-friends-and-influence-people#post-4883 Wed, 07 Apr 2010 23:32:34 +0000 Rhapsody In Prose 4883@http://forums.webfictionguide.com/ <p>"Do we live our lives hoping not to offend people around us?"</p> <p>"Yes, actually."</p> <p><strong>You counsel people to surrender what is important to gain the passing affection and/or fancy of others. Noted.</strong> </p> http://forums.webfictionguide.com/topic/how-to-freak-out-friends-and-influence-people#post-4877 Wed, 07 Apr 2010 19:28:26 +0000 Letitia Coyne 4877@http://forums.webfictionguide.com/ <p>Hi Wysteria,</p> <p>I guess your relationship with your friend is yours to sort, but writing history has a particular set of choices. </p> <p>Some people read historicals so they can feel part of another time and place. Heathcliff smacks a 17 yr old girl up the side of her head, and the characters don't berate him, they tell her she should have minded the master. No one asks that Emily Bronte be rewritten.</p> <p>But others like their history nice and tidy and sanitized - or at least closer to the way they'd like to imagine it was. Remember, millions sat through Titanic, Gladiator and King Arthur without choking on their choc-tops.</p> <p>I suppose I'm supporting your choice to let your characters speak and act as they do. Keep it up.</p> <p>L. </p> http://forums.webfictionguide.com/topic/how-to-freak-out-friends-and-influence-people#post-4873 Wed, 07 Apr 2010 11:51:17 +0000 Wysteria 4873@http://forums.webfictionguide.com/ <p>Actually, at this point I don't ask her if she reads the story and don't tell her if I update it. That's more a me-and-my-friend thing than an author-and-reader thing, however, so I have it shelved for dealing with at a later date. It hasn't stopped me from writing: if anything, it makes me desperately want some new readers who will actually dig the story as it is. I am brainstorming a marketing plan. </p> http://forums.webfictionguide.com/topic/how-to-freak-out-friends-and-influence-people#post-4870 Wed, 07 Apr 2010 10:13:40 +0000 Lyn Thorne-Alder 4870@http://forums.webfictionguide.com/ <p>"Do we live our lives hoping not to offend people around us?"</p> <p>Yes, actually. </p> <p>I wouldn't trivialize Wystie's reactions, or her friend's reaction. There's always a difference between writing for our IRL friends and for the faceless internet audience. How my best friends react to my chapters affects me differently than how my other readers do... and I've had moments where I almost stopped writing because I upset a reader.</p> <p>That being said, Wystie, I know I'm late to the party but ,as others have said, don't let it hold you back from writing. I hope by now you've talked about it with the friend and everything is kosher?</p> <p>~Lyn </p> http://forums.webfictionguide.com/topic/how-to-freak-out-friends-and-influence-people#post-4620 Mon, 22 Feb 2010 07:56:45 +0000 Rhapsody In Prose 4620@http://forums.webfictionguide.com/ <p>Do we live our lives hoping not to offend people around us? Do we write seeking the safe and middle path? Sure, it's a drag that your friend is unhappy, but what's the answer? To write in such a way so as to never offend her? Doesn't she bear *some* responsibility in all of this? If I was her, I'd simply stop reading if I found something I didn't like and then just tell you, "Hey man, that last chapter didn't appeal to me because of XYZ." I dunno why people keep reading stuff they don't like. What's the point in that? </p> http://forums.webfictionguide.com/topic/how-to-freak-out-friends-and-influence-people#post-4598 Fri, 19 Feb 2010 14:55:09 +0000 Braveluck 4598@http://forums.webfictionguide.com/ <p>To evoke a strong reaction in a reader, especially in their relationship with a fictional character, means you are succeeding. Don't think it sucks. Write some more. Now the challenge could be to get your friend to like the husband again in subsequent chapters????? I love it when I'm reading a story and I start to like/sympathize with a character I did not like or considered a bad guy. </p> http://forums.webfictionguide.com/topic/how-to-freak-out-friends-and-influence-people#post-4590 Thu, 18 Feb 2010 10:07:12 +0000 Lizzy 4590@http://forums.webfictionguide.com/ <p>I guess the critical distinction to make is this: was your friend upset by *you* for writing something that horrified him or her, or upset by the character for earning her affection and then doing something cruel? </p> <p>If it's the latter, Chris' point above is spot on. If the former, your friend is being very judgemental and unrealistic. Maybe J.K. Rowling's friends were pissed off at her when SPOILER ALERT: Dumbledore died? I dunno. But the other millions of people who read the story were sad for the characters only. They didn't (and shouldn't) connect their feelings to the author instead of the story. </p> <p>I guess it's a hazard of getting people close to you to read things that aren't always happy and fun. </p> http://forums.webfictionguide.com/topic/how-to-freak-out-friends-and-influence-people#post-4583 Wed, 17 Feb 2010 02:27:22 +0000 Chris Poirier 4583@http://forums.webfictionguide.com/ <p>Wysteria -- I got to tell you -- moving someone to tears with my writing is a high compliment. It takes a lot to move people. People tell me I've made the squirm, before, or feel "on the edge of their seat", but tears are pretty rare. It's only happened to me once, to my recollection. I know it's a bit worrisome that you may have hurt a friend, but, honestly, I'm having trouble seeing it as a bad thing in terms of your art. </p> <p>Chris. </p> http://forums.webfictionguide.com/topic/how-to-freak-out-friends-and-influence-people#post-4582 Tue, 16 Feb 2010 21:14:09 +0000 Wysteria 4582@http://forums.webfictionguide.com/ <p>Rhapsody, this was a very close friend who was genuinely upset near to the point of tears by something I wrote. It bugs me because I upset my friend. I think that's a somewhat natural reaction. </p> http://forums.webfictionguide.com/topic/how-to-freak-out-friends-and-influence-people#post-4580 Tue, 16 Feb 2010 19:08:46 +0000 Rhapsody In Prose 4580@http://forums.webfictionguide.com/ <p>This happens all the time, only we don't hear about it. I mean, how many people found something they didn't like in something we've written and just stopped reading -- without a word? And how many times has a band or a writer or a speaker said something that you just couldn't get over and from that point on, they were dead to you? I'm sure we've all done that. I really don't see what the big deal is; he doesn't like the MC anymore. Why should that bug you at all? You're not writing for him, I presume, and the story doesn't depend on whether anyone likes it, reads it, or even cares. The story is being told because it must be told and you can't hold it in anymore, right? So tell it, and let the criticism fall where it may.</p> <p>And oh, if he was really progressive, he would have just ran her through with a sword. The road to utopia is paved with human bones (just ask Stalin). </p>