Beta/Review Request: The Care and Feeding of Magical Creatures

1 year ago | Soren Tycho (Member)

So I've been hanging around the site thinking I should get around to reviewing more things, replying to threads, and generally being a good community member...and then today I opened WFG and my review of Worm was featured on the frontpage, and I figured, screw it, strike while the iron is hot.

I'd been setting things up to invite a couple of beta readers I know personally, but instead I'm going to go for broke and announce my serial here and ask if anyone has feedback or would like to become a beta reader.

The main site is here: http://sadehall.tumblr.com/index.html
But you'll be more interested in the beta site whereat the first four chapters are posted: http://sadehall-labs.tumblr.com/index.html (password: sonofatoms)

Now, if that URL sounds suspicious, that's because it is. There's quite a bit of sex, so, NSFW. And yes, I've intentionally tagged both scifi and fantasy in this post: I grew up on both Narnia and Greg Egan, and this story is the result. You'll see.

I'm interested in both story feedback and site design feedback. More chapters should be up in the next few days - my current raw word count stands somewhere north of 150k and all of the chapters listed in the TOC are written.

Thanks, everyone!
-Soren

Read responses...

Responses

  1. JPV1000 (Member)

    Posted 1 year ago

    Narnia with science and sex? What a perversion of fond childhood memories.
    ...
    Sure, why the hell not? I'm in! :p

  2. Soren Tycho (Member)

    Posted 1 year ago

    Huzzah! Thank you! You can leave feedback here, or use http://sadehall-labs.tumblr.com/ask .

    When I start posting on the real site, there will be disqus comment threads available, but I haven't enabled that for the beta site.

  3. JPV1000 (Member)

    Posted 1 year ago

    The Site Design was deific. It's beautiful--it's by far the best Serial design I've seen, well, ever. The device of using different fonts, colors, and formatting, while potentially distracting, absolutely paid off. It's striking, intriguing, and really helped pull me in. It is a little distracting sometimes, but overall it was totally worth that.
    Also, wow. When you said NSFW, you meant that. A little much for my taste, it's not really my thing, so I can't really judge that. It did seem to detract from the story as a whole for me, but I really don't read much with NSFW content, so that could just be me.
    That site design though...

  4. Soren Tycho (Member)

    Posted 1 year ago

    Thanks for the review. I don't think anything I've made has ever been called 'deific' before, so that rather made my day.
    As for the sex, yeah. This work has the property all kinky smut does wherein there's not really a middle ground between "HELL YES" and "NOPE". and it sounds like you fell into the NOPE camp - though I'm curious, did you find that it detracted from the plot by simply being distracting, or did you feel like there wasn't enough story arc in the section you read? Did you find that the beginning section made you curious about how the story plays out? One of my questions is whether those first four chapters constitute a good starting chunk for my initial launch.

    Thanks even more,
    Soren

  5. JPV1000 (Member)

    Posted 1 year ago

    Yeah, I was definitely in the 'NOPE' category--for a straight, seventeen-year-old male, I have a bizarrely low tolerance for that sort of stuff. For me it was just distracting, and it felt like the story was mostly sex. However, like I said, I have unusual standards for sex in the stories I read, so I might just be being a prude. ;)
    The beginning absolutely made me curious--it had a great balance of mystery and well-done exposition, and the site design drove that home.
    I wouldn't comment on those four specifically, but if I can speak from my experience from Warbler, I don't think that having a three-episode initial launch helped my readership much.
    No problem!

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