If anyone has the information from where can I get the ghost writing service

9 months ago | RaymondDominguez (Blocked)

For quite some time I have been looking out for some possible way out that can help me to complete writing my book in an appropriate way. I had written many chapters of the book, but after I read it, the story is not giving away the aura as it should. I suppose that my composition is not in the proper shape to deliver the accurate message. A friend of mine suggested me to get a best ghost writers for hire who is capable of proofreading the entire thing and do the editing in the chapters where it is needed, and also bring it to a proper structured form. Kindly let me if anyone has the information from where can I get the ghost writing service?

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Responses

  1. Megajoule (Member)

    Posted 9 months ago

    Typically ghost writers can be found in their mausoleums. Or graves if they weren't very successful in life. Procuring their services varies in price depending on the size of the grave the author is buried in, and some writers have specific tastes you will need to cater to, which I will elucidate below. In general you will need a pint of chicken blood, flowers picked from the top of a mountain, and the finger of an former priest. (Specific flavor of priest does not matter). Soak the ingredients for two days in a vat of whiskey and then pour out the resulting mixture over the grave or tomb. (Plus accounting for author specific requirements).

    Examples of specific needs different ghost writers will have.
    Lovecraft - he will need you to loudly shout all racial slurs you can while you pour out the sludge onto his grave.
    Tolkien - you will need to recite ancient poetry, preferably the Eddas.
    Joyce - yeah, you're gonna have to fart on his corpse

    https://inheritorsserial.com / a clone of the greatest superhero in the world, with only a fraction of the power
  2. SovereignofAshes (Member)

    Posted 9 months ago

    I can personally attest to the success of Megajoule's method mentioned above. I think he has the best ghost writing service around, honestly. There is just one small trouble with his method above, being that it is a permanent one.

    It was sometime around February, I took it upon myself to shuffle off my mortal coil to avoid updating my serial on schedule. Megajoule, in his attempts to perfect the ultimate expression of literary necromancy, tested this ritual on me. I still don't know if he did it because he enjoyed my work, just needed a disposable test subject, or if I somehow pissed him off when I was still alive. I lean to the second or third options.

    As it is currently, I exist in a state of prolonged undeath where the only form of sustenance I can draw upon is reader comments and the cheeto-dust-laden blood of neckbeards playing level 14 tiefling warlocks. I am also bound by some kind of ephemeral force to manage the doggo pic flood on his Discord server. I think I do so happily, but it's hard to know for sure with the necromantic powers Mega wields.

    Although Mega's power as a literary necromancer is primo goodness... Before undertaking these unholy acts, please be aware of how these poor 'ghost writers' will exist when they are pulled back screaming into half-rotten bodies. I can personally attest to the fact that I can only write at night; the light of the Sun is anathema to me. I admit that sometimes I think about eating the flesh of the living, but I resist mightily. It's hard to maintain personal relationships when you look like Max Schreck from Nosferatu. Cats and dogs are perfectly fine with me, but rabbits, parrots, ostriches, and small mice will let out ear-piercing shrieks of the damned when I approach. I also have to do a nightly check to make sure any of my limbs haven't fallen off. Sometimes I have to fight the growing urge to set up an elaborate dungeon and use eldrich sorcery to bring about the end of days... You'd think I was a lich or something.

    Despite all these problems, I'm one of the lucky ones. You don't want to know what Megajoule did to Oscar Wilde or Ambrose Bierce. At least I'm corporeal and still have a head. I heard when he brought back Rhodeworks, the poor fellow now has to sustain himself on sarcasm and some demonic essence called 'pud.'

    Also... Yeah, thanks a lot Mega for doing the Joyce method on me. You know all you had to do was bury a d20 in some grave dirt and say "All hail Gygax" backwards three times to bring me back. =P

    I have stuff on here too! The Vorrgistadt Saga.
  3. Sharkerbob (Member)

    Posted 9 months ago

    I don't think that show has been on the air for, like, over two decades. You might be able to find the VHS copies floating around somewhere.

  4. Thedude3445 (Member)

    Posted 9 months ago

    I saw Hereditary recently and I have to warn you: do NOT attempt to get a ghost writer. Do NOT. It will not work as you expect it to.

    Sorry boss, but there's only two men I trust. One of them's me. The other's not you.
  5. BGHilton (Member)

    Posted 9 months ago

    Wow, that's some website. It's like a guide for how not to use a thesaurus.

  6. Jim Zoetewey (Moderator)

    Posted 9 months ago

    I wish I’d seen this before anyone else because I’d have deleted the message since it’s obviously spam. Since you’re having fun with it though, I’ll leave it.

  7. Alexander.Hollins (Member)

    Posted 9 months ago

    Jim, if you can, may want to blast the link in the sig line of OP though. The link along with discussion is a tactic used to drive up google results.

  8. Admiralmonkeyman (Member)

    Posted 9 months ago

    All the other writers are talking about some mostly expensive and time-consuming methods. I, luckily, was able to get my ghostwriter very easily with this new DIY method people have been talking about. All you have to do is write a runic summoning circle with your blood (or sheeps blood as an alternative.) and chant "Sk'lrt, um'sgil vurglo!". Eventually, this nice red man with goat legs will give you this contract for your ghostwriter. I signed it without really reading, it said something about your soul and stuff.
    After you sign the contract you'll get this pasty and frail man that'll write for you. Much easier and cheaper in my opinion, you can even do it all at home! The only side effects I've found is that I've got this rune burned on my arm and sometimes my eyes will turn bloodshot and bleed a few pints of blood. I've also woken up in a valley of rats, maggots and dead bodies a few times.

    https://fujiserial.wordpress.com/ - Ash covers the land as snow. The embers of a forgotten time have died out. All that’s left is us and the dark.
  9. Jim Zoetewey (Moderator)

    Posted 9 months ago

    Alex: Good point. Couldn’t remove the link without deleting it, though. So it’s deleted.

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