Review Request: Aethernea

11 months ago | Cloe.D.Frost (Member)

Greetings!

Aethernea has just been listed on Web Fiction and is looking for reviews and any kind of feedback. :)

Aethernea is a new fantasy web novel, that started releasing 2 months ago. Currently, it has over 60k words and 50k views.
Two chapters are released every Thursday, with each one being over 2000 words in length.

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What can you expect from Aethernea?
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✔ Adventure ✔ Mystery ✔ Humor ✔ Romance ✔ Systematic Magic ✔ Strategy in Fights ✔ Cerebral Puzzles ✔ Character Development ✔ Power Up ✔ Character Depth

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Summary:
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In the world where everyone can perform magic, where adventurers, treasure hunters, and enchanters are common professions, and where mage duels are the most popular form of entertainment,

Kiel is a “non-mage” – a person who doesn’t have the aptitude to use magic on a regular basis – until he meets Elaru- a mage of mysterious origin, who claims she can give him the power to become the greatest mage world of Halnea has ever seen.

After making a deal that he would surely regret, the only thing standing between him and his dream university of magic, are the entrance exams.

Little did he know, that he would be pulled into a web of lies, ancient riddles, and fatal secrets, where one wrong step could bring his untimely demise.

What secrets are hidden deep in the darkest parts of the forbidden zone? What truly happened over a millennium ago to change the lands of Halnea into its current state? What is the source of The Ink – a mysterious plague spreading through the continent? Why has the third race of Halnea – the Ascended, mysteriously disappeared and what is the connection between the remaining two races?

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Links:
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The listing on this site can be found here: Link

The fiction itself can be found on aethernea.com

Thank you for taking the time to read this. :)
I hope you give Aethernea a shot.

Read responses...

Responses

  1. Tartra (Member)

    Posted 11 months ago

    Hot damn. Over 50k views already? How did you go about building your audience?

    The Other Kind of Roommate — Like Fight Club meets X-Men meets The Matrix meets Superbad.
  2. gloomybear86 (Member)

    Posted 11 months ago

    What Tartra said. My serial's been out for over a year and I'm not anywhere near 50k views.

    For Riches or More: You can't always steal what you want.
  3. Team Contract (Member)

    Posted 11 months ago

    It's that eye catching Anime Artwork! :D

  4. DrewHayes (Member)

    Posted 11 months ago

    That is one of the most aesthetically pleasing, well put-together websites I've seen for a serial. That it's only 2 months old is all the more impressive. Really great work on the design, will mark it for reading down the line when I've got the chance.

    Super Powereds & Corpies
    http://www.DrewHayesNovels.com/
  5. Tartra (Member)

    Posted 11 months ago

    Dude. Seriously. Your site is beautiful!

    The Other Kind of Roommate — Like Fight Club meets X-Men meets The Matrix meets Superbad.
  6. GeneralRincewind (Member)

    Posted 11 months ago

    Where did you get your artist? It's really good art.

  7. Cloe.D.Frost (Member)

    Posted 11 months ago

    "How did you go about building your audience?"
    Maybe I should write an article about that?
    32k out of those 50k is actually from Wattpad. Wattpad is a site where people put their serialized fiction for other people to read. It has 40M monthly active users, so it is a very active and supportive community. Instead of just making Aethernea available on aethernea.com, I also put it on Wattpad. Since wattpad is also a social platform, it makes it possible to talk to people who might be interested in your novel. So I took a lot of time to just talk to people.
    It takes me more time to spread the word than it takes me to actually write.

    "That is one of the most aesthetically pleasing, well put-together websites I've seen for a serial. That it's only 2 months old is all the more impressive. Really great work on the design, will mark it for reading down the line when I've got the chance."
    Thank you very much! :D

    "Dude. Seriously. Your site is beautiful!"
    Thank you. :) Glad that you like it.

    "Where did you get your artist? It's really good art."
    Thank you :)
    No artist XD just me...and a lot of hard work...

  8. Tartra (Member)

    Posted 11 months ago

    @Cloe - Y'know, I dipped a teeny toe into Wattpad once and then pulled it out because the site felt too heavy on early teen users. They're a barrel of laughs and great energy, but they aren't my target audience. How did you navigate the site? And yes, seriously and by all means, write up an article for it. I'd love to know how many months or years you working in advance.

    Also: holy shit (sorry), that's YOUR art? Goddamn, Cloe. I've gotta hire you for something.

    The Other Kind of Roommate — Like Fight Club meets X-Men meets The Matrix meets Superbad.
  9. Dary (Member)

    Posted 11 months ago

    As nice as the site looks, it's also rather difficult to navigate on mobile thanks to adverts that keep rediverting me to app stores. You might want to check your ad provider to see if you can block such shenanigans.

  10. GeneralRincewind (Member)

    Posted 11 months ago

    @Cloe Seriously? You drew that yourself? Well, congrats dude. Speaking as a guy who's tried to do that and failed , its bloody awesome. Where'd you learn how to draw?

  11. GeneralRincewind (Member)

    Posted 11 months ago

    Can I just say one thing? I haven't read all the episodes in your web serial yet, so take my opinion with a very very large pinch of salt.

    It has kinda an immense information overload. You're dumping so many terms in the first few episodes, and switching between various time frames and perspectives, and all intrigue has been dumped in the blurb and first episodes. Too much information. I now don't really want to read of the meeting between Kiel and Elaru, mostly because I can guess how it goes, and so apparently most of the second episode hooks are lost. There also appears to be a serious risk of Mary Sueness with the descriptions of the characters in the first episode. They appear to be OP. And OP characters are interesting... They're hard to write, but awesome if you pull it of. If you fail you just generate another Mary Sue/Marty Stu to be assigned to the dust heap. I really hope that the story doesn't fall into this trap.

    Better read on too find out!

  12. Cloe.D.Frost (Member)

    Posted 11 months ago

    "Y'know, I dipped a teeny toe into Wattpad once and then pulled it out because the site felt too heavy on early teen users. They're a barrel of laughs and great energy, but they aren't my target audience. How did you navigate the site? And yes, seriously and by all means, write up an article for it. I'd love to know how many months or years you working in advance.

    Also: holy shit (sorry), that's YOUR art? Goddamn, Cloe. I've gotta hire you for something."

    There is indeed a lot of teenage audience on wattpad but there are also a lot of people from different age brackets. Unfortunately, you can't go and pick an audience. I am lucky since I don't have a target audience in mind. I am writing Aethernea so it could be attractive to all kinds of different demographics. Both teens and more mature audience, as well as male and female readers. So Wattpad is a great place for me.

    How did I navigate the site? I am not sure I understand what you mean by that.

    I'll put that article on my todo list :)

    Haha, thanks :D I don't offer art services, though. Mostly because it takes me a lot of time(that I don't have) and hard work to produce a high-quality art. And because I don't have much confidence in that area as I am just a hobbyist that has no education in graphic design and art.

    "As nice as the site looks, it's also rather difficult to navigate on mobile thanks to adverts that keep rediverting me to app stores. You might want to check your ad provider to see if you can block such shenanigans."
    Been fighting this for a while, whatever ad provider I try, it ends up pulling redirecting s*** on me. Thanks for telling me this. I just removed the ads altogether for now as the whole point of placing ads was for them to be unobtrusive. I'd rather not have ads than have them negatively impact the reader experience.

    "@Cloe Seriously? You drew that yourself? Well, congrats dude. Speaking as a guy who's tried to do that and failed , its bloody awesome. Where'd you learn how to draw?"
    Nowhere really. I just used to draw as a hobby when I was bored, like, in classes. :) I have no education on the matter whatsoever. Just personal experience and more than 20 years of practice. It also helps greatly if I find several awesome reference images e.g. for how I want the ears to look like, etc.

    "It has kinda an immense information overload. You're dumping so many terms in the first few episodes, and switching between various time frames and perspectives, and all intrigue has been dumped in the blurb and first episodes. Too much information. I now don't really want to read of the meeting between Kiel and Elaru, mostly because I can guess how it goes, and so apparently most of the second episode hooks are lost. There also appears to be a serious risk of Mary Sueness with the descriptions of the characters in the first episode. They appear to be OP. And OP characters are interesting... They're hard to write, but awesome if you pull it of. If you fail you just generate another Mary Sue/Marty Stu to be assigned to the dust heap. I really hope that the story doesn't fall into this trap."

    Thank you for reading!
    Aethernea introduces a whole new world with a unique magic system, culture, and lore. So for certain things to make sense, the reader needs to be introduced to them. I am doing my best to avoid an information overload and introduce information gradually. However, it is very hard considering the sheer amount of information I wish to convey. I would be very grateful if you could point out what you found confusing and what made you feel an information overload so I can improve it.

    "I now don't really want to read of the meeting between Kiel and Elaru, mostly because I can guess how it goes"
    Interesting. I've never thought about this. Can you let me know how you think it goes? If you are mostly correct then I should consider skipping to another point after their meeting and then having a few flash backs later.
    The reason why I didn't skip to a later time, when the two were already together, is because this period is extremely important. It introduces several very important plot points and gives Kiel a motive that will guide the story. It is essentially a life-changing event for both of them, and I wanted the readers to start the story from the beginning, instead of feeling like they don't know a lot about what happened.

    Don't worry. It won't fall into the Mary Sue pit :)
    I've elaborated this in the comment you left me on aethernea.com

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