Entirely Presenting You - Review Request/Swap

It's been a little under a month since I got listed (yay!) and I just recently concluded my first arc.

I figured now would be a decent time to finally start asking for reviews.

Here is the site: https://entirelypresentingyou.wordpress.com/

And here is a link to first chapter: https://entirelypresentingyou.wordpress.com/2016/09/30/yomi-001-a-fools-apple/

Reviews are appreciated, from 5s to 1s.

If you want to do a review swap, just let me know how far into the work I need to be to appropriately judge it. Also, know that it might take me forever to do it.

Thanks ahead of time!

I'll give it a whirl.

I'm not sure how far you'd need to read through mine to make a solid judgement, but once you've got an idea of what you think about it then further reading probably won't change it.

Awesome. @Is_Generally_Hostile

I'll take a crack at your serial later in the week. Hopefully I can get in a review in a reasonable time frame.

Hello Nippoten,

Your story sounds like its right up my alley (or in my dark corner of it... lol). I wouldn't mind doing a review swap if interested. Mine is a horror story and it's rather long and graphic at times. If you want to give it a peek to find out if you're interested, just let me know. As far as how long you should read for review purposes, well, the first seven chapters cover the first arc (twenty episodes total). I'd say at least that much would give you an idea. Just know going in that my story centers around multiple leads that don't get together until the tenth chapter.

Thanks for the interest, @Scott Scherr.

I won't mind making this a review swap. If that's the case, I'll go up to the tenth chapter at least :)

Sounds great. It might take me a few days to get started but I look forward to reading your story. Love the title, by the way. It's catchy ;)

Scott's a great writer and reviewer Nippoten! If you like zombies, it's a fun read. For me, the only thing I would say that's been better, web fiction wise, has been Worm.

Looking forward to the review, then, and reading both of your serials of course! Although, it will take a bit, life is crazy right now.

And Scott, thanks for liking the title!

I posted my review.

I didn't love it, but once you got into the actual vampiric bits it definitely got better. Curious to see where this goes from here and how you evolve form this.

Thanks for checking it out, and for being critical. My review for yours won't be for another while, so bear with me.

Absolutely. Hope I wasn't too harsh. I definitely enjoyed the vampire bits. Curious as to the nature of the initial vampire.

Not too harsh, though a half-point extra wouldn't be so bad...

I'm just kidding.

After reading your review though, it made be briefly consider moving the arc illustrations elsewhere, either to the bottom of the chapter or just keep it in a separate gallery page on the site. Perhaps making my terrible art the first thing people see when clicking isn't the best thing after all.

I like the title page image, don't get rid of that.

The art looks fine, in a 'cutesy' sort of way... having not read the story (vampires, not my thing, sorry) I can't tell you if it fits the story it goes with well or not, but assuming your story is relatively cute and lighthearted, then the art works just fine.

Now if we open it up and find bloody carnage spelled out in loving detail... then maybe you should consider changing it.

@Fiona Gregory, I'm actually really proud of the banner image, so that won't go away.

@TanaNari, I suppose I like that it doesn't fit with the story that well, but that's just me.

The banner image isn't bad.

The image on the first entry would have put me off reading entirely if I hadn't agreed to do a review swap. There's lots of talk on here about the importance of covers, titles, and the potential reader's first impression and if you think you'd get even one more reader without the image, than personally I would do away with it. There's at least one other piece on here that sounds pretty cool to me, but the art for it has kept me away from it. In the end, I'm nobody. If you dig it, stick with it. If the writing is good enough, you can put a tightly coiled dog turd on every page and people will still read it.

As far as it being your "terrible art" - that's super cool you can draw or digitally paint, I wish I could.

Fair enough.

Bumping, if this is okay.

It's been four months since this thread was posted, and six months since the story has started. The story has definitely progressed since then.

I figured now is a good time to request reviews again.

I can't promise a review swap though, considering I haven't gotten to the ones here yet. (Sorry about that, by the way)

All I'm saying is, if you're in the mood to review something, why not give my webserial a spin?

@ Nippoten. Took me long enough, but I finally got a chance to read your story. I've posted my review.

@Scott Scherr Thanks for the review, I appreciate that you pointed out what works and what didn't. It'll really help with future edits.

Sorry I hadn't read enough of your story to review yet, but I'll get on it... eventually. :)