Hi @ClearMadness. I'm a relatively new writer, though a lifelong reader, so keep this in mind as you evaluate my comments. This is a critique, not a criticism.
I read the Prologue for now.
You have good descriptive power overall. A good logical flow I could visualize. An interesting world and lots of good things happening.
My suggestions are
1- trim/edit/reduce - too many words, especially during fast paced action scenes, tends to slow the movement. I'm betting you can lose about 1/2 to 1/3 of that page. For example a quick edit.
"The young man shivered as an arctic gust blew in over the city walls and slammed into him. It stripped the warmth from his body as it blew past, and filled his vision with a storm of snow that drowned out the rest of the world. He huddled down and pulled his fur coat and heavy cloak tighter in an attempt to keep some remnant of warmth safe within himself."
The young man shivered as the arctic wind slammed into him. It stripped the warmth from his body, and filled his vision with white. He gripped his cloak with numb fingers in a futile attempt to block the frigid air.
I'm not saying this is a good rewrite, just easier to illustrate my thoughts this way. 70 words becomes 40 and still conveys the basic info and feeling.
2- vary your sentence length. For example shorter sentences, and even some fragments, during action tends to speed things up and add to tension, and can enhance stuff like the confusion or fear of the protagonist etc.
3- use two or more senses, where possible to better anchor your great descriptions so it becomes more part of the scene.
4- look out for places where you tell stuff, and see if you can show it in others ways i.e. instead of sayings "it's terribly cold" he could 'feel the ice crystals forming in his nostrils'
5- when using descriptive words consider using words that convey or tie into the imagery. For example you use the word 'drowning' to describe the snow blocking his view early on which doesn't feel cold and white to me - if that makes sense.