Serial was rejected. Help?

My serial was recently rejected for grammar inconsistencies.

I think that the moderators may have possibly taken chapter one's perspective swap as accidental instead of a stylistic choice and rejected me on that basis.

I'll make sure to reread and edit my chapters once again and resubmit. But it would be greatly appreciated if I could have someone personally help me with this subject.

Hi there, I took a quick look at your first chapter. As of a quarter of the way through, there were already some things I noticed:

-Many, many comma splices. Comma splices occur when one separates two independent clauses in a sentence with nothing but a comma. This practice is grammatically incorrect. For example, from your first chapter: "Thoughts of going my way and leaving you went through my head, acting like that and making those choices were my way at this point, but you looked so confused and scared."

-"A feeling of missingness" -> The unusual word choice is jarring, especially since it's in the opener. Do you think 'absence' or 'emptiness' also works? Or does it have to be 'missingness'?

Thank you for helping. I have gone through another edit on chapter one (Because that one is especially in need of an edit) and will check my other chapters. Now all that's left is to wait for editorial review again.